There's no handbook we get when we give birth to our children. It may sometimes seem like our parents knew everything while we wander around aimlessly simply trying to keep our heads above water with our own kids. A few weeks back I heard the sad news of Michele Duggar giving birth to her 19th baby prematurely. Wether you like, dislike or could care less about "super birthers' like Michele, any mother who has raised 19 decent kids in my opinion, can be considered an expert. So I navigated my way to the family website and came across Michele and her husband's tips on child rearing .
The one tip that jumped out at me was the tip to "praise 10 times more than you punish" . This is probably the most important and difficult aspect of raising a child for me, because that is not how I grew up, and that is not my "natural" instinct. As part of my New Years Resolution to find ways to improve myself I think it's especially important to improve the biggest part of who I am and that's a mom. In every career field you have , sometimes mandatory, staff development programs, and in my working life I attended more seminars than I can shake a stick at . So to me the Duggar's website is a Mom Seminar to improve my parenting skills.
Praising 10 times more than you punish is pretty simple but important step in developing children who have good self esteem, after all how would you respond to someone nagging you all day ( if you're not sure just ask my husband , but that my friends is another resolution all together)) . Wouldn't you feel better about yourself if someone instead praised all the things you did right ? The Duggars also don't believe in empty praise , which I think this generation has confused with real praise . The Duggars praise character traits instead and not actions : for example :
Child picked up their toys independantly
Wrong way : Good Job picking up that stuff
Duggar Way : You are very responsible picking up your toys by yourself , GREAT job !
I think praising instead of punishing will be less stressful for me as well and create a more peacful home . read more Duggar tips on child rearing Here
What Tips do you have for creating a more peaceful , productive home ?